This week, I finally decided to sit down and write about what everyone has been telling me I need to share. In today's age it is not new for young adults, middle age or even older adults to have an online dating profile. With school, work, kids, and everything else in between, dating can become very difficult to squeeze in. Online dating is something I have done for a long time. Since I live in a small town it can be difficult to meet anyone unless it is through friends or hitting the bar scene. This past summer, I have gone on several different dates whether it was going to the derby, rodeo or just sitting down and talking. This post is not just to warn you about online safety when dating, but also to show you just how crazy some of these people can be.
One thing I have learned over the years is to talk for a week or two, maybe even longer before willing to meet them because it is best to get to know a person and see if you have a connection before really meeting them. I do know there are times where you just feel like it is right and meet them a day or two right after the first initial contact and that is fine to. For the first post of the series, I thought it would be best to start out with the craziest one that I have encountered so far. In this particular situation, I did not go on a date with this guy because we never got that far it was still in talking stages.
Okay, I will get to the story now of how everything went down with this guy. No real names will be given out or anything to respect their privacy, so I will use the name Blake*. Back in August of this year, I had a message from this guy named Blake* on the website MeetMe. We started talking just like any other person would and he wanted to add me on Snapchat, which I let him and so our messages then went from talking on MeetMe to chat or pictures on Snapchat. Blake was a good looking guy, my type of country boy and lived about an hour away, we had the same interests and everything. We have been talking for a couple of weeks and getting a long pretty good, but I honestly didn't feel any real connection with him. I am the type of person if I do not feel a connection, I'll still talk just to be friends. Well, Blake then tells me that he likes me and at first I am taken back because he really has not shown any interest in the way he talked to me. I do not remember what I told him, well a couple days later he was acting all upset and I asked him what was wrong. His response was, I might be going to prison, my first thought was great what kind of guy am I actually talking to here. Without even asking him, I just stopped replying to him and the next day he sent me a snap saying are you done talking to me? I figured, you know he deserves to know why I am not responding to his snapchats. Being honest, I told him that I was now leery of why he is going to prison and he said well this is what happened: "It was on a Thursday morning at like 8 a.m. when he heard a quad going by his house so he grabbed his gun and took off on his quad, to follow the guy on the quad. We went for 5 miles, before he stopped and walked about 120 feet before he stopped at meth lab on my property. I stayed hidden behind some trees but fired off a couple warning shots in the air to scare him off. Well the guy took off on his quad and I chased him on my quad when he pulled a gun out on me and I shot him the side."
I then asked him why he is going to prison when it was self-defense and his response was that the guy he shot was pressing charges. My next question was then, how could he press charges when he was trespassing on your property and doing a meth lab. Blake's* response was because the guy now has health issues from me shooting him in the side. My initial response was okay, well it was self-defense and I did ask if he has been in trouble before and he said no. I then asked about when his court date was and he said next month (September) and that he is looking at 5 years in prison. About a week later, I seen him at a public event, but kept my distance from him. I did not feel like it was the right time to go up to him and speak to him, as because it was very hot that day and I felt gross and also most people like to mentally prepare themselves before meeting someone they have been talking to. Blake found out I was at the event and kept wanting me to come talk to him, but just told him it was not the right time or anything.
After that public event, we did keep talking and I noticed again he was upset so I asked what was wrong and he said his son was heading to the emergency room. A couple days later I asked him how his son was and he said not good he might need surgery on his kidneys. Keep in mind, I had no idea he even had a kid at this time, so I was shocked he never brought his son up in conversation before. A couple days later, he said his grandfather had died and he was like a dad to him. I felt so bad for Blake, because here his son is sick, then his grandfather died and then about a week later he tells me his uncle has committed suicide. Blake had just bought a new truck, which that is one of my weakness as it was a Cummins and in a nearby town there was a mud bog going on, so I figured why not ask him out and see if he wants to go.
A few days before the event we got into an argument (I do not remember what it was over) and to smooth things over I asked about his son. Blake's response was he is doing good and I said so no surgery? Blake, then said he had surgery and is doing just fine. My next question was when is your court date? The reason I asked about the court date is because since first telling me about going to prison he has not mentioned at all about when the date was. By this time, I am starting to kind of like this guy, even though at first I did not feel any connection. Blake said that his court date was that next morning and I said wait, what?! I was so shocked that he had not warn me or even mentioned it as we were supposed to go out that weekend. This should of had been my third red flag with this guy, but I went along with it. We talked until like 4 am at that morning, when he got off work, and he said that I am going to shower and sleep because court was at 8 am. I woke up around 7 am and it was already time for him to be in court since they are in a different time zone. Around 9:30 a.m. he texted me saying that he is going to prison and that he had twenty minutes before they take him. Keep in mind, I have never dealt with anything prison, or court wise so he had an upper hand in this. I do know enough that sometimes you can appeal the court’s decision and so I asked him about making an appeal, Blake then said they are appealing it. About three hours later Blake texted me saying, the appeal did not work and he is going to prison so it is time to leave me.
Later that night I noticed the numbers on his Snapchat was going up and so I sent a chat to his snap and said um last I knew they do not allow cellphones in prison. The response back was this is his mother and I am telling everyone that he is in prison. Which that is a decent response, and about two hours later I get a text from Blake number saying is this the girl Blake has been talking to. I texted back saying yes, this is the girl he has been talking to. At this time, I am assuming that it is Blake's mother. The response back was that Blake had called from prison saying that he misses you, to smile and hi. His mother also said that he asked the judge if he could print out a picture of me to take with him and the judge allowed it. The next day I get a text from his mother saying Blake got in a fight with a guy and he cannot talk for a week and that he broke the guy nose and eye socket but Blake is fine. I should have known that this was another red flag, but again I ignored the signs but was starting to catch on.
This is the part that if you do not read anything else please read this! By law any one has a right to mugshots, when someone is arrested, released, who is in prison etc. I started to search around for Blake's mugshot, court details, news article about the shooting anything at all to tell me about everything going on. Big shocker, there was nothing no mugshot, no news article, no court details, nothing at all. I decided then to check Facebook and see if I could find Blake's profile even though he told me I do not have a Facebook. Low and behold, he does have a profile and he has been active on it. Well with this much information, I went further into his account and found out his grandfather did die, found out that his son did not have surgery at all and nothing about his uncle. With the information I had, the best thing to do was confront Blake and call him out on his lies. When confronting him, his mother said my son did not lie to you and the information is not online because he is just now being transferred to the prison. My response back was I thought he was already at the prison and they came back he is. There was the truth all right there, if he was already at the prison then why is he being transferred there. I waited a day and confronted him again and they came back calling me a bitch and saying if I did not believe her that I should write him. I write back, then give me his information. The response? None, there was no response back at all, because they knew I had caught them.
What I have learned from this incident is to check out people before even going out with them or anything. You do not know who anyone truly is until check them out. Yes, the internet is not always telling the truth, but if you cannot find anything at all about a situation like this more than likely they are lying to you. Please, please, please be safe out there!! I cannot stress enough to watch your back. If you are meeting a guy, ask to meet in public with people around. Even then have a can of pepper spray on you or something, just to be extra safe. I know everyone hears this all the time, but in this situation it could have easily gone downhill. Since confronting Blake for the second time, I have not heard from him nor do I want to. In a way, I feel sorry for this guy because he felt the need to lie about everything, even the truck was a lie!
Next month, I will talk about another guy I have encountered but it is not as crazy.
One thing I have learned over the years is to talk for a week or two, maybe even longer before willing to meet them because it is best to get to know a person and see if you have a connection before really meeting them. I do know there are times where you just feel like it is right and meet them a day or two right after the first initial contact and that is fine to. For the first post of the series, I thought it would be best to start out with the craziest one that I have encountered so far. In this particular situation, I did not go on a date with this guy because we never got that far it was still in talking stages.
Okay, I will get to the story now of how everything went down with this guy. No real names will be given out or anything to respect their privacy, so I will use the name Blake*. Back in August of this year, I had a message from this guy named Blake* on the website MeetMe. We started talking just like any other person would and he wanted to add me on Snapchat, which I let him and so our messages then went from talking on MeetMe to chat or pictures on Snapchat. Blake was a good looking guy, my type of country boy and lived about an hour away, we had the same interests and everything. We have been talking for a couple of weeks and getting a long pretty good, but I honestly didn't feel any real connection with him. I am the type of person if I do not feel a connection, I'll still talk just to be friends. Well, Blake then tells me that he likes me and at first I am taken back because he really has not shown any interest in the way he talked to me. I do not remember what I told him, well a couple days later he was acting all upset and I asked him what was wrong. His response was, I might be going to prison, my first thought was great what kind of guy am I actually talking to here. Without even asking him, I just stopped replying to him and the next day he sent me a snap saying are you done talking to me? I figured, you know he deserves to know why I am not responding to his snapchats. Being honest, I told him that I was now leery of why he is going to prison and he said well this is what happened: "It was on a Thursday morning at like 8 a.m. when he heard a quad going by his house so he grabbed his gun and took off on his quad, to follow the guy on the quad. We went for 5 miles, before he stopped and walked about 120 feet before he stopped at meth lab on my property. I stayed hidden behind some trees but fired off a couple warning shots in the air to scare him off. Well the guy took off on his quad and I chased him on my quad when he pulled a gun out on me and I shot him the side."
I then asked him why he is going to prison when it was self-defense and his response was that the guy he shot was pressing charges. My next question was then, how could he press charges when he was trespassing on your property and doing a meth lab. Blake's* response was because the guy now has health issues from me shooting him in the side. My initial response was okay, well it was self-defense and I did ask if he has been in trouble before and he said no. I then asked about when his court date was and he said next month (September) and that he is looking at 5 years in prison. About a week later, I seen him at a public event, but kept my distance from him. I did not feel like it was the right time to go up to him and speak to him, as because it was very hot that day and I felt gross and also most people like to mentally prepare themselves before meeting someone they have been talking to. Blake found out I was at the event and kept wanting me to come talk to him, but just told him it was not the right time or anything.
After that public event, we did keep talking and I noticed again he was upset so I asked what was wrong and he said his son was heading to the emergency room. A couple days later I asked him how his son was and he said not good he might need surgery on his kidneys. Keep in mind, I had no idea he even had a kid at this time, so I was shocked he never brought his son up in conversation before. A couple days later, he said his grandfather had died and he was like a dad to him. I felt so bad for Blake, because here his son is sick, then his grandfather died and then about a week later he tells me his uncle has committed suicide. Blake had just bought a new truck, which that is one of my weakness as it was a Cummins and in a nearby town there was a mud bog going on, so I figured why not ask him out and see if he wants to go.
A few days before the event we got into an argument (I do not remember what it was over) and to smooth things over I asked about his son. Blake's response was he is doing good and I said so no surgery? Blake, then said he had surgery and is doing just fine. My next question was when is your court date? The reason I asked about the court date is because since first telling me about going to prison he has not mentioned at all about when the date was. By this time, I am starting to kind of like this guy, even though at first I did not feel any connection. Blake said that his court date was that next morning and I said wait, what?! I was so shocked that he had not warn me or even mentioned it as we were supposed to go out that weekend. This should of had been my third red flag with this guy, but I went along with it. We talked until like 4 am at that morning, when he got off work, and he said that I am going to shower and sleep because court was at 8 am. I woke up around 7 am and it was already time for him to be in court since they are in a different time zone. Around 9:30 a.m. he texted me saying that he is going to prison and that he had twenty minutes before they take him. Keep in mind, I have never dealt with anything prison, or court wise so he had an upper hand in this. I do know enough that sometimes you can appeal the court’s decision and so I asked him about making an appeal, Blake then said they are appealing it. About three hours later Blake texted me saying, the appeal did not work and he is going to prison so it is time to leave me.
Later that night I noticed the numbers on his Snapchat was going up and so I sent a chat to his snap and said um last I knew they do not allow cellphones in prison. The response back was this is his mother and I am telling everyone that he is in prison. Which that is a decent response, and about two hours later I get a text from Blake number saying is this the girl Blake has been talking to. I texted back saying yes, this is the girl he has been talking to. At this time, I am assuming that it is Blake's mother. The response back was that Blake had called from prison saying that he misses you, to smile and hi. His mother also said that he asked the judge if he could print out a picture of me to take with him and the judge allowed it. The next day I get a text from his mother saying Blake got in a fight with a guy and he cannot talk for a week and that he broke the guy nose and eye socket but Blake is fine. I should have known that this was another red flag, but again I ignored the signs but was starting to catch on.
This is the part that if you do not read anything else please read this! By law any one has a right to mugshots, when someone is arrested, released, who is in prison etc. I started to search around for Blake's mugshot, court details, news article about the shooting anything at all to tell me about everything going on. Big shocker, there was nothing no mugshot, no news article, no court details, nothing at all. I decided then to check Facebook and see if I could find Blake's profile even though he told me I do not have a Facebook. Low and behold, he does have a profile and he has been active on it. Well with this much information, I went further into his account and found out his grandfather did die, found out that his son did not have surgery at all and nothing about his uncle. With the information I had, the best thing to do was confront Blake and call him out on his lies. When confronting him, his mother said my son did not lie to you and the information is not online because he is just now being transferred to the prison. My response back was I thought he was already at the prison and they came back he is. There was the truth all right there, if he was already at the prison then why is he being transferred there. I waited a day and confronted him again and they came back calling me a bitch and saying if I did not believe her that I should write him. I write back, then give me his information. The response? None, there was no response back at all, because they knew I had caught them.
What I have learned from this incident is to check out people before even going out with them or anything. You do not know who anyone truly is until check them out. Yes, the internet is not always telling the truth, but if you cannot find anything at all about a situation like this more than likely they are lying to you. Please, please, please be safe out there!! I cannot stress enough to watch your back. If you are meeting a guy, ask to meet in public with people around. Even then have a can of pepper spray on you or something, just to be extra safe. I know everyone hears this all the time, but in this situation it could have easily gone downhill. Since confronting Blake for the second time, I have not heard from him nor do I want to. In a way, I feel sorry for this guy because he felt the need to lie about everything, even the truck was a lie!
Next month, I will talk about another guy I have encountered but it is not as crazy.